2014 gonna be sucha huge year for me..

1) Last semester in NTU
2) Last chance sharing the stage with Unific
3) FYP
4) Fighting for 3rd class
5) Finding a JOB
6) Grad trip with joy & friends

Challenging year but i foresee it to be an awesome one! Spent 2.5 years focusing on enjoying life with friends and dance.. I feel blessed to be able to embark in such fulfilling university life.. Thankful is the only word i could think of to sum up this remarkable journey.

& yes am turning 24 HELLLLLLLLL YAYYYYY NOT .... But well life gotta go on yo, ain't nobody's gonna stop me friend spending time with friends who are 4 years younger HAHA Craziest shit was to be able to click with people of such young age.. Sometimes i don't get why i can never click well with people of my age or older :/ Maybe i'm too used to being the "eldest" sister? Hmmm probably?

BUT.. The craziest thing ever is to take up the role of a dance captain when i can't dance for god sake. My life now is all about unific and this is INSANE. These two months, my top priority it to lead this team to success! Not gonna care about family, joy, grades, fyp... NO NOTHING BUT DANCE! Its not that i have great passion in dance but more of bringing success to this amazing family/team. I am not gonna explain on why im putting in so much cos i believe on 28th Feb 2014, people will understand. :)

Trust me, it's gonna be mind blowing! It is gonna be the best 6 mins everyone could receive, or at least the best 6 mins i could provide.

Ok thats all,
bye folks!

I'm amazed how kind a person can be.. I would love to be like them, always having this very positive mind that no matter how bad a person is, they still have a good side in them. I feel truly blessed to have friends around me who are so so sooo nice. It warms your heart and also set you thinking. Thinking if one should reflect and not judge a person before knowing them. Every single time when someone new walks into my life, that person always set me thinking. Every event in life is an opportunity to reflect on yourself and learn something new.

I've set my priorities.. Hoping that they are damn right. I know it's right as long as I feel happy doing it? Life is so much more than just good grades. I really hope university students can start appreciating life as a student more before it's too late man. Every single day we have something to worry about, which is SO WRONG! Before we step into uni we worry about not having friends, when we have too many friends we worry about not having time to study, when we have we spend all our time chasing good grades we worry about missing out in life, a year before we graduate we worry about not getting a job... GUYS STOP IT! STOP WORRY AND START LIVING? I don't get why the hell are people worries about getting a job ONE FREAKING YEAR before they graduate? Don't they know what's cherishing the present before it's gone? Don't they know that what's most impt for student is none other than youth? Youth is something that once it's gone, it'd gone forever? We have to start living uni life the RIGHT way.. Though I know this is really subjective.. But if you have the ability one do not have to worry because there are tons of opportunity out there. What you have to worry is not being about to see events as opportunity and not being able to grab hold of it! Everyone is in this world for a purpose, find where do you belong is really the most impt thing you should do in life. If you love studying so much, be a researcher a professor. If you don't like studying then you're meant for other stuff?

I honestly do not know how Singapore education has turned into cos' I haven't been following up with it. My past 2.25 of my life in ntu had been more of an in my own world kinda life. I had all the freedom in the world to do what I want and to meet who I want. Though there are a few times where reality got me, I got upset, felt beaten and I lost faith in myself.. But all that merely lasted for a day? I feel that as long as we take up the responsibility that whatever thing you do/choice you make/feelings you feel, will allow you walk very far.

Stop feeling pressurized by people around you. Let them do what they wanna do, you don't have to do what they are doing cos that will only make you feel better but not make you feel happy or satisfied. Trust me, if one is given time to fully discover their potential and where they belong.. The world will turn into a better place. If Mother Nature is the problem, we are the solutions.

Try living in the moment, trust me we'd love it!

Friends who are living in different phases of life needs extra effort maintaining. Everything seems alright because we perceived that it was but actually deep inside.. It's not. Communication is tough that's why there are courses like communication studies in universities right?

I think one shouldn't be too defensive about being the one at fault because eventually everything takes two hands to clap. Everyone is at fault so STOP the blame game and START finding solutions!

I haven't been this sad for a long long time already.. I got no idea how to explain myself, both of us are strong headed its very hard for us to come to a conclusion, or that there isn't any answer to this?

All that I can say is that, it hurts because it matters.

SIGH

So it's the end of week 2 for school, glad to be able to spend my first week chilling around and playing mahjong! Definitely will miss those carefree moments. Week 2 went by pretty quick with all the work on hand. Pressure's definitely building up, work too! Thankful for those around me, without them my life would be at stake now man..

Took up the role as a dance captain without much thought few months back and now it's apparent to me that it's not gonna be easy~ I've for 3 full school terms as a dance captain. For now, my mind is filled with expectations and pressures from everybody including myself! Gonna fight on and hopefully I could reach my goal for Unific!

Next concern would be my dearest final year project. Encountered problems even before starting it lol Given only a month to finish reading + understanding dynamics.. Nearly impossible so just do my best~

Currently, am feeling quite positive towards what's on hand now.. Won't dent that I'm stressed up but I always believe that "eventually, everything will turn out just fine".

This time, I'm really pushing myself out of my comfort zone! Wish me all the best man !!

Haha oh and I'm currently into squash! But sadly, I won't have much time to train for squash. Will train more after hocc !! Can't wait for final year to end!

No one said it was gonna be easy, but it's definitely gonna be worthwhile :)

Goodnight !!

I believe there are better things to worry about but i guess it is just something that i got to let it out before i could go on with life.. I guess the lack of support made everything worst? Now i finally understood the importance of having a committed member in a team, every committed member gives warmth to my heart.

You know, no one will ever bother about you when it comes to fun. Not even your closest.. Well i guess it is a harsh fact that i got to learn to accept and yes i am thankful for this opportunity to learn. Learning it a really hard way, but i believe i'll grow after this experience..

When you're facing this all alone, it sucks..

But no matter how sucky it is.. i am not gonna make this a wasted opportunity!!

"Adversities are just changes in life that we haven't adapted to"

Thank you for reading my rants, Goodnight!

I hope this post would successfully be posted up because i drafted countless. It is not that i didn't wanna post but it was more like, it didn't felt right.

After reading my previous posts, i realised that i will only pen down unhappy stuff WHICH I KNOW ITS NOT GOOD.. Can't be helped la, i'm often too busy enjoying and cherishing the happy times and only had time to think through unhappy occasions.

Time is tickling awayyyyyyyy and soon i'll be 24 and graduatinggggggggg...... I should stop bumming around and start planning.

Haha i really lost interest in sharing stuff here .... Too much thoughts, i don't know how to type it all down leh. Just know that i'm currently doing really good, enjoying my internship and soon to be a final year student! Made a lot of new friends, gotten close to many more!

OH suddenly thought of something MUST WRITE HERE MUST MUST MUST!

Dear humans who are guilty,

Our father gave us the privilege to own a car is for OUR OWN CONVENIENCE! Please do not take your friends who owns a car as your personal driver. I know to you singapore is small but no matter how small singapore is.. its still bloody inconvenient! You won't know how expensive the petrol is, the erp is, the carpark is AND MOST IMPORTANTLY HOW PRECIOUS MY TIME IS! You jolly well take a public transport/cab/airplane unless we offer to send you guys back. REALLY LAST WARNING HOR! Please stop making those who drive feel guilty whenever their friend had to take a public transport back because we are not suppose to feel obliged!! THIS IS SO WRONG ARGH.... We, drivers, do not owe you guys anything k, we are not your foc taxi!! The poor us can only rant to each other about how sad our lifes is :( I swear only people who owns a car can relate to what i'm saying. For those who don't, go get a car and i am very sure after a few months YOU WILL EVENTUALLY UNDERSTAND.

I am gonna sleep now, felt so good after ranting (;

Down with some problems lately, couldn't find solutions to it since months ago, tried my best to fight of an outcome that would make me happy.. But I guess it's very hard for one to be truly happy. Yeah I no longer able to find joy in my life, not even with family or friends.. I know that's bad but thats really what I feel in me. Everyday seems to be a fucking boring routine, no motivation to anything no one to be my motivator(except myself) etc etc. I guess these are signs of getting old? Haha now I get why people doesn't wanna grow old, because the older you are the suckier life gets or should I say the more life demands? Haha I just feel that I screwed up my year 3 because I chose grades over everything else.. I gave up all hall commitment and hall friends for a hope of getting a better gpa. I screwed myself even more when I chose to do online lecture over attending the actual one cos I lost all my friends and I have to eat lunch alone almost every single day. Fuck myself I'm just someone who can't live without NOT socializing!!! I just hope next semester would turn out better, lets just hope unific does miracles k? And for the fact that Shermaine's gonna be away for 6 freaking months and I won't have any toilet mate, I cannot just budge into her room as and when I feel like to sit on her floor/chair lie on her bed :/ thinking of this just made me more depressed :'( I know it's NEVER gonna be fine when she's gone :( I'd miss her :( anyway that's not the point.. The point is LIFE ISN'T VERY SMOOTH SAILING NOW.. It's not that it sucks totally just need to change my mindset.. I stopped believing in myself(cos my grades stinks) and I'm doing my best to revive it but if at the end of the day it still stink den imma give up and do something more useful in year 4. Aiya uni just suck la, I've never been this negative before in life kkkk! WHAT SHOULD I DO TO HELP MYSELF??????? Sigh bye